These few months, due to the lack of rest, I fell ill for 3 days and then passed the virus to baby and she had fever for 1 day. Contrary to what my family members think, I would like to believe that it's my breastmilk that makes her recover faster. Yes, my cranky baby didn't make me give up breastfeeding. When lots of mommies been sharing about their dip in milk, mine has increased.
I have close to 70 ml now :)
I feel that working life is easier and less stressful compared to a SAHAM. I am very stressed up when my PIL are back home coz they cannot stand baby crying, probably not even 'eh eh eh'. It's difficult cos I have to drop the pump and attend to baby. I have to carry and quiet her in the shortest possible time. I have to give pacifier earlier. I have to feed when I would have waited 30 mins more if I were home alone.
In general, mommies can't wait for babies to outgrow this stage, and wish for a magical wand to turn them into 1 year old straight away. But if I can turn back time, I will choose to go back to the day of my delivery. I dun mind going through the contractions, show, waterbag leaking, labour pain and all that all over again just to correct what I did wrong, or should I say, not do right. I mean it. However, in reality, there's no turning back and we can only move on.
I have high expectations of myself and seriously, buying all those supplements of fenugreek, motherlove blend, domperidone, anmum lacta and multivits for breastfeeding cost alot of money.
Alot of ppl say 'chin chai chi, chin chai dua'. To me there is no such thing. Even the formula milk selection, I can stand for 30 mins to check and analyse the ingredients. I almost wanted to take picture of every brand and compare the ingredients back home.
Anyway enough of the lengthiness, I just wanted to give myself a pat on the back. I have done well and I am doing the best I can. All the sleepless nights magically doesn't matter when I see baby's big grin in the morning.
